NYC. I really don’t like it. It’s crowded, it’s loud, it’s dirty, it’s cold, it’s alienating...it really isn’t a place made for humans in my opinion. In NYC you don’t live, you survive. And you barely do it.
And I am not talking about the “Sex & The City” NYC that tourists and wanna be Carrie Bradshow get to live in for a few weeks during their trips (or fantasies). That’s a beautiful city, fun, dynamic, eccentric, exotic, diverse, engaging. One you’ll fall in love with forever. No, I am not talking about that NYC. Nor I am not talking about the “Great Gatsby” New York, the exclusive, elegant, glamorous, fashionable and luxurious city the riches have access to. Who wouldn't love that one?
I am talking about the real NYC, the home of Serpico and Taxi Driver, the city 99.99% of the people sleeping within the five boroughs experience everyday. The rough, unsettling, hysteric, overpriced, restless concrete jungle that beats the shit out of every fucking person who lives in it. Every fucking day. Since ever.
That NYC, the real NYC, I really don’t like it. And it’s not like I didn’t try. I lived in the city for 3 years, both as a student and as a young professional. I have been an extremely (first world) poor student sharing a room, eating potatoes and going to rooftop parties (and making rafts).... and I have been a fairly "wealthy" young professional with a nice west village apartment going to restaurants and comedy clubs with the peace of mind of not having to care too much about bills. But in both cases, the city had never maintained its glamour more than a few weeks.
When I left the NYC 2 years ago, I had only one pleasure left: talking to NYorkers about how shitty NYC was. I know, very weird.
In my defense, it is a really funny activity because NYorkers don't really like NYC. They think they like it, they say they like it...but they don't. The truth is that they need NYC, that's all. They are not lovers, they are addicts. And when you put them on the spot, they come up with the weirdest excuses on why New York is the best city in the world. I attached a real conversation I had a few years ago at the bottom of this post for you to judge.
Anyway, the reason I vented about NYC is that that’s where I spent my April in and that’s where I’ll likely be until after the summer.
I must say, the city has changed since I left. Covid forced it to change of course. It’s not so crowded, rent is more affordable and people seem to be going slower than usual. Probably because they don’t need to run to the office anymore.
Even the nightlife has changed. Until February 2020, going out in NYC meant spending $25+ for a drink you had to consume inside a place with way more people than legally permitted while listening to music played so loudly you couldn’t even hear your own thoughts. Like….fuck that!
Today, because of Covid, bars have been granted outdoor space and you can have a drink without fighting for your own survival. It also means you can talk to people and meet people while you are out. In all honesty, today NYC nightlife almost feels like Europe (in a good way)...besides the $25+ drinks. Those have remained.
But even besides Covid, there are things I had missed back then that I am liking better now. Brooklyn, for example, is one of them. I spent the last month between Williamsburg and Greenpoint and I confess that it's a much nicer vibe than Manhattan. Much nicer. Smaller building, smaller roads, less people. More human. Still NYC, but insanely better.
The one thing that I actually realized coming back, however, is that there is a specific feeling in NYC that I haven't experienced anywhere else. Something I never truly rationalized while living in the city but I now realized I have always loved.
It’s a small thing and you don’t get to experience it too often, but when you do it’s definitely worth noticing: it's the moment you arrive to Manhattan. Not to live in Manhattan, just to arrive to it.
Whether you are driving through one of the bridges, riding the train or coming with the ferry, whether it’s day or night, there is always a moment, a very clear moment, when Manhattan suddenly appears to your eyes and simply punches you in your guts with all its strengths.
It’s incredible. You are sitting in a car looking at the small buildings of Brooklyn or the suburban towns of Jersey when suddenly the landscape abruptly breaks in front of your face. Maybe your view gets obstructed by the ramp of a bridge, you are making a big turn on the highway, you are getting into a tunnel...something breaks the "routine" of your view and for a few seconds you see basically nothing. A wall, some empty land, the river. "Nothing".
Then, all of a sudden, BAM! There it is, right in front of your face, so close and so colossal you wonder how the hell have you not seen it earlier, the Manhattan Skyline. So thick you can’t see through it, so tall you can’t see past it, so sudden you can’t even consume it in one sight.
It’s overwhelming. All those skyscrapers built on top of each other and so close to the water you wonder if there they are coming directly out of the earth's crust. It's inhuman, it's Incredible. And when you see it, for a moment, you feel like you are at the center of the world, like if you are the special guest arriving to the party of the year, like if you are witnessing greatness right there right then.
If Hegel was alive he would probably place NYC in a very specific place of his universal system, something dedicated, something taylored. But since Hegel is dead, I can go ahead and embarrass myself saying that the view of NYC is a magical wonder, is the rationalization of chaos into matter, it's the antithesis of nature, it’s the personification of mankind into ordered urbanism. Incredible.
…
Sorry about that, pure nonsense. I am just trying to express how powerful seeing NYC for the “first time” is. Quite powerful.
Anyway, as I was saying, I am back in NYC. I don’t know for how long honestly, could be a few months, could be more. It really depends on my job at this point. I am remotely starting at FB on Monday but technically I will have to go back to the office in Menlo Park once things get back to normal.
Even then though, I don’t think I will go to Menlo Park. I don’t want to, it’s so boring. I rather live 7 years less than live 7 years in Menlo Park (see conversation below). 100%.
My plan right now is to wait as much as I can here in NYC and then either convince them to let me stay in NYC (LA is not an option unfortunately) or quit . Great plan, I know. Very thoughtful.
The thing is that not only I don’t want to go to Menlo Park, I am also not sure I want to work at FB. Or better, I want to work in tech. That’s why I am in NYC right now, I have a few friends that work in production and I spent the last month trying to understand if I can make a jump and go work with them...or not.
Basically the idea was to shadow them here and there, get some sort of training, see how it feels, maybe overlap the two jobs for a few months and then switch.
So far it didn’t go SUPER well but it went pretty well. I wasn’t able to work that much with my friends but I got to work on a small project (will share soon) and I had a lot of fun. I am still not ready to make a full jump, but I will be soon. In that sense, I am glad I am joining FB because I am doing something “good” while I prepare for this change. Good career wise of course. World wise neither FB or Production do good for the world, I know.
My plan is to continue investing in this production project for the next 2-3 months, which is another reason I want to stay in NYC rather than Menlo Park, and then change. Here I can work on two things at the same time (FB and production) and reduce as much as possible the time I get a salary I can barely live on. Again, not the most thoughtful plan I know, but that's what I have.
Anyway, “that’s a wrap” for April. More shit happened this month, like the fact that I spent 2h on a train track looking for one of my air-pods and managed to find it after an incredible tech hack: playing high pitch sounds on youtube (see pics of where the fuck it was)...but I’ll leave it for next time we meet, otherwise what the fuck are we going to talk about.
I am also already very late on April’s schedule so better close it here. I was aiming to send this out early May but the 2nd vaccine shot made me feel tired as hell last week so here we are.
Well, as always, I hope you are happy, healthy, wealthy (if it matters) and that I’ll see you soon.
Apology of a NYorker
(From a real life experience)
Stranger: What do you mean you don’t like NY, how can you not like NY?
Me: I told you, it’s overprices, dirty, loud. Did you know people are expected to live 7 years shorter in NY?
Stranger: But it’s NY!
Me: That’s not really an answer, isn’t?
Stranger: I mean, it has everything.
Me: Not really. Surely it doesn’t have a lot of space, fair prices, clean streets and chances of living 7 years longer than the rest of the country, doesn't it?
Stranger: Yeah, but it has everything else.
Me: What’s everything else?
Stranger: What are you talking about? Everything.
Me: Like?
Stranger: Great parties.
Me: They are having fun elsewhere as well, believe me.
Stranger: Great Food.
Me: Barely affordable.
Stranger: Great people.
Me: Any city with 10M people has great people in it.
Stranger: A great metro.
Me: A g-r-e-a-t metro?
Stranger: Ok, maybe that's a stretch. But a good metro. Can you imagine living in LA? To drive? No way man.
Me: Why are you bringing LA into this? It's not like it's one or the other in life, there are other cities in the word you know that?
Stranger: Nah, not like NY.
Me: Again, WHAT'S special about it?
Stranger: Ok...the other day I needed a screwdriver and it was 2am in the morning. In ANY other city in the world I would have had to wait the next morning...but HERE, I just had to walk to the hardware store on Lex and 34th and buy one
Me: Ok, first of all, what the fuck did you need it a screwdriver at 2am in the morning for?!? Also, how many other times did you actually had such a crazy need...and most importantly, why couldn’t you fucking wait the next morning?
Stranger: Because I didn’t want to. AND I didn’t have to.
Me: Ok, fine I’ll give you that. I have never heard of hardware store open at 2am in the morning anywhere else. But do you realize that I brought to the table overpricing, crowdedness, dirtiness, loudness and a life expectancy 7 years shorter than in the rest of the country and you are bringing a fucking 24h HomeDepot?
Stranger: Yeah
Me: And you are good with that?
Stranger: Yeah
Me: Cool